Ug. Maybe I'm just a little edgy, but I'd like to give a huge STFU to this show on child actors that I'm watching on A&E. What a bunch of fucking whiny complaining rat bastards. Yeah, I've never been a child star, and I don't understand their particular set of unique problems. But who the fuck cares? Get over it and move on. Freakin' Tootie from The Facts of Life just broke down and started weeping about something. Gag. Vomit. Man, I need something to smoke, RIGHT NOW!!!

Not sure if I've linked to True Porn Clerk Stories in the past, but it's got great stories and deserves a "just to make sure" link.

Jesus, I just remembered that this is fucking rent week. Why was I thinking it was next week? This will be the second to last month that I will be paying rent. That will be a relief, but the relief isn't worth the way it's going down. Add that one to the pro-smoking debate.

Ok, it's 7:45 pm and I made it through the day without buying a pack of smokes. (or smoking anything) I can feel the "edge" coming on. Tomorrow should be a nice edgy day for me. Hopefully, I'll be able to hide out in my office all day and avoid all the cheerful non smokers in the building. This is so stupid, because on a normal not quitting day, I would not be constantly thinking about the demon smokes. I'd smoke on the way home from work, maybe have one when I took the dog out, but that would be it for the night. Now, I'm sitting here, trying to rationalize how I could go and smoke.

krisobi's latest rationalizations for starting to smoke again...
1. If I WALK to the convenience store to buy a pack, that would be ok, because I'd be getting some exercise, it would be a trade off.
2. I've smoked for so long, what does a couple of more weeks/month matter?
3. I have nothing to do in the car when I'm driving.

That's all I have for now, but I'm sure as the night goes on, I'll be able to think of more reasons why it's a bad idea for me to quit this week.

Ok, I went back and realized that last monday was supposed to be the beginning of my "get my shit together" plan. Oops. I was thinking it would be stupid to try to do everything at once so maybe I should just start with one thing at a time. [rationalization at it's finest, thankyouverymuch]

Anyway, my point is that I ran out of smokes last night, so I think that it would be a good time to quit. Had 2 on Saturday, had 1 yesterday, and then they were gone. So I'm going to see how long I can go without buying a new pack. So good-bye smokes. It's been a great 10 years or so, but it's time that we end our relationship. I will miss you, our long drives together, all the drinking we did together, the times you were there for me when no one else was. But lately, you haven't been good to me. The cough I have almost everyday, my diminished lung capacity, the wrinkles in my skin (not that bad yet), discolored teeth, the bad smells, you've done me wrong, and we can't be together anymore.

Wow, I could really use a smoke right now. ha ha ha ha [no, I'm totally serious]

You know how when you fix something, you feel like the smartest person ever? I just fixed my DVD/CD drive in the powerbook. And I used an "unconvential" method to do it too... now it totally reads CDs, DVDs, whatever, if it's a disc, it's being recognized. So now, I'm feeling all MacGyver-esque. Good times.

In other computer-related news, and in keeping with my very responsible fiscal nature, I just got myself a new digital camera. I spent the first couple of hours, after the battery was charged up, flipping the lens around and taking pictures of myself making stupid faces. More good times. Totally digging it so far.

There's been a bunch of things that have been bothering me lately and putting me in kind of funky mood. Bad times. But today I took Phoebe down to the beach and we went for a long walk and then sat and watched the boats for awhile. It was a great thing. It made me think, everything is really ok. The lake totally rocks. We're all covered in sand and smell like the lake, but feeling good...

And then I get home and Over the Top [yes, the Sly Stallone arm wrestling movie] is on. Life is good.

There was a song back in the 80s by Jeff Paris called "Saturday Night." I love that song. It's everything that's fabulous about 80s hair metal. I have the video somewhere in my collection of taped Headbanger Balls. The video is basically a bunch of crazy kids going to a beach party, where Jeff Paris is playing. Pretty cool. [side note, Matt Sorum played drums in the song] So, my point is that every time I hear the phrase, saturday night, this song starts playing in my head...

It's Saturday night, the band's alive and it's alright...
It's Saturday night... time to parrrrttyyyy....

As I sit writing this at 10pm on a Saturday night... not time to party for me. Maybe I'll dig out the tape and live vicariously through the video...

uh-oh. I've been busted here at work... Must go into uber-productive employee mode...

Man, my diet has just reached a whole new low. I had stuff from Dominoes delivered [not exactly sure why], pizza and those new chicken strippy things. Looks good in the commercial, right? Whatfuckingever. When I opened the box and pealed back the foil, the chicken strippies were flourescent orange. Yes, bright fucking orange. Not a color that occurs that in nature very often. And yes, I ate them anyway. Tasted like ass, but when I put blue cheese on them, they weren't that bad. But starting Monday, man, I'm going to try and make an effort to clean up my lifestyle.
1. Smoking? No more. Gonna totally quit.
2. Junk food? No way, it's gone. No more Slim Jims and cheese steaks for me.
3. Spending all weekend watching the Real World marathon? Never again. Going to go outside and do stuff.
3. Exercising? You bet, sign me up. Fucking marathon runner...
4. Drinking? Quit drinking? ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!! You have got to be kidding me. What am I? Freaking pregnant??!!??? Bra-ha-ha-ha...

Monday. Yep, monday... Let the countdown begin...

Currently, I am stuck in the hell that is my weekly timesheet. I always let them slide until I have like 3 weeks to do at once, and by the time the 3 weeks go by, I can never remember what I did in those 3 weeks. Maybe if I took better notes, or kept better track, or did some other organizational shit, I might be on top of things. Do I do any of that? NO! I let the shit slide and then make up a bunch of shit that is sort of true. I'm tempted to just start turning in previous sheets to see if the chica in accounting is on the ball.

Ok, after about 2 years-ish, I think I might have decided on a logo for krisobi.com. Here it is. And no, that gawky, skinny, dorky child is not part of the logo. Now, if only I could decide on the rest of the site...

<--- and look, the archives are back from their suspicious absence...

Ok, where the rest of my freaking archives? I've noticed that they've been gone for about a week or so. Very suspicious...

ug. Still feeling really hung over. Saturday was a really good time. But an hour and a half of sleep is not enough. Good thing I didn't have anything to do today... Thank god for the real world marathon on mtv. Today I needed some mindless entertainment to distract me from some things. Definitely going to bed early tonight...

The pictures from the wedding I was in a couple of weeks ago are available online and I spent a good portion of the morning looking at them. They came out pretty good. Here's a link to some of them... Man, that was a good time. I should get my film developed.

And today is Friday the 13th... wooo...

Liver cirrhosis is the way I'm going to go and buy the farm. [shocked] That's so shocking!! [/shocked]

I bet lung cancer will be runner up... but I'm quitting soon, so I won't have to worry about it. Where's my lighter?!!??

Ug. Looks like I'm going to have to add ABC to "the list." Not that I even really watch them anymore. I think the last show I watched regularly was NYPD Blue, and I stopped soon after Simone bought the farm. Why does everyone strive to be so bland and unoffensive? Ug.

And damn them to hell for using the term Happy Hour to describe their unholy union.

Things I've learned in the last week-ish...

Time Warner WILL shut off your cable if you don't pay the bill. I guess they'll let you go for about 2 months, and then BAM! No more Real World marathons.

Younger guys are a lot of fun.

My job is still incredibly boring, even when we're crazy busy.

This is what my car looks like after getting the window smashed in by some rat fucking bastard. Not good times. It also looks like this, and also this.

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