Merry Christmas to everyone! Here's to a healthy and happy new year!!

Image(323).jpg

My camera takes really crappy drunken bar pictures. Last night was some good holiday drinking fun. That I am still recovering from 18 hours later...

Image(320).jpg

Freaking traffic. Stupid ice.

With Christmas being less than two weeks away, I thought I'd share a Christmas memory from one of my past 30-something Christmases.

[insert cheesy lifetime movie music]

Back in 1987, my favorite gift was Anthrax's "I'm the Man" EP. On cassette. I was so excited, I made everyone listen to it right way. They were less than impressed. That's it, the whole story. Great, eh?

What made me think of that story? I left my iPod at home today and needed a tape to listen to. I dug into my glovebox and found that Anthrax tape. 18 years later. Still kicks ass, even if the tape is a little rough in parts...

Step up sucker, understand. Don't you know? I'm the man.

Hey Kris, what's for lunch?

Um, a Slim Jim and a bag of Munchos.

Nice lunch. WTF? Are you 12? Shouldn't you be eating something a little bit healthier?

Yeah, I know. But it was really good.

How do expect to be a good influence on your future children, if you can't even eat responsibly?

Good point. Good thing I'm not pregnant.

Not that I want to just constantly bitch about the stuff people ask for on freecycle, but this one really mashed my potatoes...

Wanted: Snowblower in good and working condition. My son-in-law just moved here from Miami and would really enjoy one for Christmas this year.

Really? Are you kidding me with this? I've lived here for most of my life (minus the Atlanta years) and I've never had a snowblower. Yes, it sucks to shovel snow, that's why I got married. (just kidding) Go to Sears and buy one you lazy slob or spend the $10 and get him a really good shovel. I would really like a snowblower in good and working condition, but I would never ask someone to give me one for free. Jeez, the sense of entitlement of some people... and why is someone moving here from Miami? Great, just what we need, more people moving here to complain about the weather.

Have I mentioned that I belong to my local freecycle group before? I think I should stop getting their emails, because while most of them are innocent, some will send me into the rage faster than finding out that Halle Berry has a bigger part in the newest X-men movie...

This is the one that put me over the edge today:

My husband has had to eat cold sandwiches for dinner several times
this week because I was late getting home to cook dinner before he
went to work. (And his cooking ability is limited to peanut butter and
jelly sandwiches!) Thinking a crock pot might help. If you have one
that's been on sabatical for a while, I'd love to give it a venture.

Um, oh my god. If your husband is too lazy to learn to cook for himself, too fucking bad. Let him eat cold sandwiches. (which are not that bad) I have not one bit of sympathy for that guy. Lazy fucking Neanderthal. Learn to cook, how goddamn hard is it to cook pasta and sauce? Soup? Unless dude has no arms and/or is in a coma, I find it hard to believe that he is that worthless in the kitchen. I'm envisioning this guy to be like "Bring me some turkey potpie! And a Bud! Hey! Get your fat ass out of my way, the game is on!!!" He probably voted for Bush too...

You know, I think it takes a certain amount of skill to read all that from an innocent freecycle request.

There is a protest against the new Walgreens that is being built at the corner of South Clinton and that other street I can never remember the name of. They have these great giant rats, two of them, helping them make their point. I think they are protesting because walgreens is using the wrong kind of workers, I'm not sure. I would protest it because there are about a billion freaking drugstores within a mile radius of this new one. We don't need another one. Maybe next week, I'll bring these guys some donuts and coffee. It's cold out and I can support the cause.

There is something about South Clinton Ave that makes people want to protest. There are the anti-abortion protesters outside a building where I'm assuming they do abortions. It's always the same 2-3 men. And usually on the nicer weather days. No donuts for them.

And then there was this person who painted their standard beige colonial-style house, bright lime green with a hot pink trim to protest some changes in the zoning laws. That was great. I salute that guy! Someone eventually bought that house and has since painted it hunter green with a burgandy trim. That is so 1994. I liked the green/pink combo better.

If anything, it makes driving to work a little less dull.

Whew, I’m tired today. I stayed up way too late last night working on a Christmas project. Without going into details on what it is, because this space isn’t as secret as it used to be, I can say it will either be a fabulous, well-received idea or a huge crash & burn failure. I don’t like to do things halfway… ;)

My husband said that I can’t make Christmas cookies this year. Because apparently eating cookies made primarily of butter and sugar for breakfast, lunch and dinner for two weeks straight, puts me into the rage more often, and when I’m not in the rage, I’m a slug. After he pointed it out to me, I realized that he might have a pretty good point and that maybe I should try to make the weeks leading up to Christmas as rage and slug-free as possible. I’m sure my mom is still making cookies, so if I really need the cookie fix, I know where to go.